Most people don’t even think about meeting the great hereafter, but sure enough, one day, out of nowhere … wham!
Tag: television
Gwyneth Paltrow introduces new “This Smells Like My Vagina After I Wipe My Ass From Back to Front” candle aroma
“If you’re very attentive, you’ll be able to note that I have a lot of kale in my diet,” Paltrow advised.
Report: Police arrested 3 midget poachers near “Game of Thrones” wrap party
“Knowing that a star of Dinklage’s stature was going to be present ahead of time, we were able to dispatch intel and net three of these dwarf-trafficking bastards,” said Chief Constable Hamilton. “Today we made it a little bit safer for little people.”
In memoriam: Comedian Tim Conway, 85, succumbs to injuries sustained in Siamese elephant trampling
The resilient comedian had previously survived a well documented koala attack in the early 1980s.
KITT reportedly “devastated” he hasn’t been called about “Knight Rider” reboot
According to K.I.T.T., gigs have been sparse. His most recent job — playing an aging Volvo that gets into a fender-bender on an insurance commercial — in his own words “wasn’t the best paying gig”.
MLB Commish Manfred proposes increase in commercials-to-action ratio for bored young fans
Commissioner Manfred: “I can’t imagine a better time than watching a lot of stellar, exciting, emotionally-charged advertising from Draft Kings, Taco Bell and Budweiser, and spacing it out with occasional images of players in tight fitting uniforms just kind of hanging out in a lush green field.”
Brown Valley Observer 