President Trump: “There’s something not entirely right about it, but my staff keeps reassuring me that the man is as trustworthy as they are.”
CNN Cafe in Seoul adds “Nothing Burger” to daily menu
The CNN Cafe in Seoul may have enjoyed this week’s most irreverent moment when they introduced a sauteed hamburger roll listed as 빈 햄버거, (bin haembeogeo), which translates to “empty burger” or “Nothing Burger”.
Report: one man’s testimony helped convince Mueller to close the Russia collusion investigation
Brown Valley Observer seeks Russian sponsor to expand unbiased reporting of magnificent, handsome President
Editor D.R. Everend conceded that “we’ll need some more funding if we plan to accurately, and without any real bias, cover the presidency of the magnificent and incredibly handsome Donald J. Trump. No collusion.”
Trump to hire DC prostitutes to urinate all over White House
Trump has procured a crew of K-Street prostitutes “(urinate) on every mattress or piece of furniture they might have sat on.”
Russian intelligence hacks 8 year old’s homework assignment
Figgins, who is not a particularly adept student and who is prone to exaggeration and excuse-making, has been offered an extension on the assignment.