“I’ll remember from now on to keep Pfizer and Starbucks and Bank of America — companies I am confident have my best interests at heart — in my nightly prayers. God bless you, corporate sponsors!”
Women in Congress have only had their own restroom in the US Capitol since 2011. Lately, it’s been a nightmare of used tampons and “hover method” usage.
Cellphone video shows that US Attorney General William Barr was spotted outside of a Golden Corral restaurant in Largo, MD less than 3 hours before his scheduled 10am Congressional hearing.
“Some things have been done, and some things have been said, and some people have started saying I’m low class,” the performer lamented to the crowd.
“Well, I’m here to prove to my haters that I’m not Low Class Snowbama, I’m at least Middle Class Snowbama.”
“When I said that I opposed gun control measures, I couldn’t have been more clear: I meant that I did not want Democrats enforcing them.”
“This is not the position that we had hoped to stand behind, but we remain steadfast in our opposition to this president, and we will come out fighting, as usual.”