The FEC reports that 71% of election officials — and 80% in swing states — failed to become certified in common-core ahead of the election despite new common-core counting methods.
A study warns that a Biden victory in the 2020 election likely means liberal voters will receive less attention on social media, leading to adverse long-term psychological effects for many who have become reliant upon such attention.
“I was positive this would be the year, but since that’s not the case, my best bet is to once again — and for the last time, I swear — vote for someone I do not support in any way, shape, or form, neither as a person nor as a policymaker.”
Congressman Rand Kirger (I-VA) defended the choices, telling the Observer, “Kid Rock did that cowboy thing. I mean, come on … who doesn’t love the cowboy thing?”
“I’ll remember from now on to keep Pfizer and Starbucks and Bank of America — companies I am confident have my best interests at heart — in my nightly prayers. God bless you, corporate sponsors!”
A panel of psychologists who’ve researched internet attention whoring have concluded that the average social media user will never miss the average of 3 “likes” that users get whenever that user is a C-cup or smaller.