The President made claims about the effects Funyuns consumption has on the male anatomy that left many followers feeling “awkward”.
The SPLC reports growth of 20% in hate groups since 2014, with chrysophobic groups like Stop Trump and The John Cena Fan Club showing the most rapid growth.
“This is not the position that we had hoped to stand behind, but we remain steadfast in our opposition to this president, and we will come out fighting, as usual.”
“Sometimes he’d just run up like an excited schoolboy and touch (Ed Hardy merchandise), no matter who was wearing it.”
The spectacular President named Brown Valley Observer on a list of sources which the remarkable, genius leader feels are “real and reliable outlets of public information”.
CNN regular: “I had never considered that someone might take my words out of context to fit their own sick agenda.”