The newly proposed bill would effectively eliminate the sale of condoms, patches, sponges and diaphragms in the state, as well as placing penalty on the report or discovery of practices like pulling out, felching, and the loads-to-the-face and loads-to-the-tits methods.
Frazzled Bernie Sanders hopes to tax, redistribute Joe Biden’s popularity
“There has to be a way, I’m thinking, to redistribute some of what Biden has right now,” said a frazzled Sanders, who entered the night trailing Biden by nearly 10 points in polling among Democratic candidates.
Out-of-place man can’t wait to get the fuck back into air-conditioned truck
“I bet The Price Is Right is on right now. And I’m missing it. Just out here in the middle of nowhere, primping for a camera and missing the first Showcase Showdown.”
Simple fact-check crushes Kamala Harris’ hopes of prosecuting any sentient beings on alleged Pot Planet
“(Harris) gets very emotional about things she’s been passionate about throughout her professional career. Prosecuting pot offenders has always been very near to her heart.”
Developing: disgruntled firearm opens fire in Florida classroom
“You’d think someone in administration would be making better checks before seating firearms in our classrooms.” said one official.