“(Harris) gets very emotional about things she’s been passionate about throughout her professional career. Prosecuting pot offenders has always been very near to her heart.”
Time changes tonight, but you’ll still be the same useless sack of shit you always were
Time is useful.
Unlike you.
Flashback: In 1983, Elizabeth Warren proposed breaking up Van Halen
During a 1983 interview with David Lee Roth, 2020 presidential hopeful Elizabeth Warren suggested that Van Halen should break up because their success had created a shortage of cocaine for upcoming bands.
International House of Jizz hopes to rub out trademark lawsuit from IHOP
IHOJ CEO: “We’re prepared to handle this challenge like we have handled everything in the past: by gritting our teeth and going at it fast, hard and furious.”
R Kelly insists sex charges based around “Me Chinese, me play joke” game gone wrong
“Maybe I should have stopped before I got to Me Chinese, me so witty, but she never indicated to me that she was interested in stopping the game,” Kelly confided.
MLB Commish Manfred proposes increase in commercials-to-action ratio for bored young fans
Commissioner Manfred: “I can’t imagine a better time than watching a lot of stellar, exciting, emotionally-charged advertising from Draft Kings, Taco Bell and Budweiser, and spacing it out with occasional images of players in tight fitting uniforms just kind of hanging out in a lush green field.”
