“Getting away from God was one of America’s biggest mistakes. We’re going to make Christianity great again.”
“After we’re done, if you think we’re not better off, we’ll listen to whatever hate speech you have in your hearts, and we’ll adjust our policies accordingly,” the president-elect offered.
“It’s going to be very difficult to find a doctor who’ll report her being in peak physical health after this binge.”
“I’m not damaging the environment like those other cretins,” said McGlumb, who carries numerous plastic devices at all times.
Ricky Moffett — whose medical history reads like the Kama Sutra of Bad Decision Making — is planning to check a local raccoon’s teeth for cavities.
Clinton: “I’m not sure there’s a lot of substance there, but I know (Creed) is going to beat the hell out of that Russian bastard.”