“Team USA just doesn’t have a great track record with shootouts lately.”
“At least with Bjork, you know what you’re getting. What have we got to lose after this?” Commissioner Silver queried.
“There was under 20 seconds on the clock, how do they just NOT make up a call right then and advance the ball for us?”
“If the Eagles play well, we’ll have to make it look like Tom Brady fourth quarter theatrics, even though we know it gets less and less convincing every time.”
“We hope that everyone can enjoy our new inclusive snake charmer logo, and that we can move on with this dark chapter of the team’s history behind us”.