The science community has banded together in rejecting the legitimacy of a predicted June 9 apocalyptic event, dooming those of us who were really, really relying upon such an event to lay waste to humanity on this stupid planet to continue waiting listlessly for some other phenomenon like climate change, plague, nuclear winter, aliens, large kaiju-type monsters, or a meteoric event to mercifully wipe out mankind as we know it.
Scientists report that the epochal June 9 prediction, one of several Pentacost Sunday Judgement Day warnings issued by the Church of God Preparing for the Kingdom of God under the guidance of Ronald Weinland over the past decade, doesn’t hold any merit as it relies upon beliefs disproved through numerous other heartbreakingly erroneous Judgement Day predictions, and furthermore does not coincide with any other scientifically known or predictable violent or ruinous events that could cause the required global disruption to really do us in good, no matter how much we’d love to speed this along.
Ronald Weinland previously disappointed everyone with cataclysmic predictions in 2011, 2012, 2013 and 2018 that obviously failed to meet expectations. During the gap years, Weinland served four years in prison where at least the lucky bastard didn’t have to live a lie like the rest of us, disguising our true selves and trying our best to face the real world and everyone we detest through concealed contempt on a daily basis while waiting wantonly for one of his stupid predictions to just hurry the fuck up and come true already.
Dr. Randall Kirger, professor of Christian Science at Brown Valley Community College, dispatched the Church of God – PKG predictions, telling the Observer, “It seems pretty obvious that most of these evangelicals and doomsday prophets don’t know what they’re talking about. There’s plenty of scientific evidence out there that points to how and when we’ll meet our end, and it only makes sound and logical sense that Jesus will return when the meteor comes, not before it.”